Another bit from my Autobiography

Chapter 9. Beginning of 1967 to Beginning of 1968

Mr Smith (I think) was the name of my teacher in this year. Without either of us knowing it at the time, he inspired me in many ways. One was story writing. Each Friday afternoon, he would tell us the latest chapter of a story he’d made up and put together the week before. Nowadays, he simply wouldn’t be able to do it (far too PC!). Here’s why:

His stories were called ‘The Adventures of Fatty and Lanky’, and he based them on two kids from our class. One lad had a well built stout bodily frame and the other was very tall and thin. (I won’t reveal their names). The two kids would stand on a plinth at the front of the class whilst Mr Smith read out the story – which was always funny and often contained something that would restrict them in some way (because of their size), this would be somewhat embarrassing for the kids. But they and the rest of the class absolutely loved the stories – the two kids became heroes around the school.

Soon I would be ten years old – double figures! Then other more practical skills would develop inside of me. But for now Mr Smith is the dominant memory of this year – I certainly miss those days and the two kids I went through the rest of my schooling with.

Another well known phrase used often at the time and told to us by our mothers:

Sticks and stones may break my bones

But names will never hurt me

The Story Teller

(Mr Smith – I think!)

For Friday to come and yearn a surprise

‘Come now my two characters – stand just here’

I have a nice story for all the class to hear

Often a good laugh, but never despise

We sat and we listened, eager to learn

The made-up adventure our classmates endured

From Mr Smith’s mind was what he assured

An accolade ‘Fatty and Lanky’ would earn

(A Joke…)

Knock, knock.

Who’s there?

Earwig.

Earwig who?

Ere-we-goo, ere-we-goo, ere-we-goo…

(‘Here we go’ sang in a Black Country accent)

Tuesday, 20th June 2023. Today I bought a new car. It is a black BMW for which I part exchanged my Mercedes. I used a lump sum payout from one of my pensions. The car cost £7,000 and I got £1,000 part exchange for my Mercedes.

Saturday, 24th June 2023. I had another free event, this time held in a place called Cleobury Mortimer. I wondered as I drove there whether I might meet with an old school colleague of mine from Madeley Academy (a Secondary School worked in), called Alex Smith (not the one from my Primary School). I knew he lived there and has a couple of young kids. The event was an attraction for kids. To start with I didn’t meet him, but his wife approached me and knew about me (I’d never met her). She introduced herself and called Alex on her phone who turned up later. I had based one of my characters from ‘Mr. B’s Busy-Bea – The Ritzzz Hotel’ called ‘Teddy’ on both of his kids. One was called Edward and the other Arthur. The full name of my character is ‘Edward Arthur Smith.’

I sold eight books there and two more later on in the pub. Here is an excerpt of the press release I wrote for The Ritzzz Hotel:

Press Release: A hive of activity as new book shapes up to be the bee’s knees!

There’s a real buzz of anticipation in the air with the imminent release of a new book by a Shropshire author telling the exciting Christmas story of the fight to free a colony of bees from an invisible curse.

Mr. B’s Busy-Bea (The Ritzzz Hotel) is the latest offering from Roy Bradshaw and is his fourth published work following on from three popular books in the Barley’s Biscuit series…

Friday, 30th June 2023. I was invited as a guest to a networking group called BNI held at a golf hotel in Wolverhampton by my publisher Paul Naylor. Although I liked the concept and the people I met there, the costs are too high for me to join right now. I may well look again later if my book sales take off more.

Saturday, 1st July 2023. I had another event at Edgmond Village Hall in Newport, Shropshire. It is more of a table top sale rather that arts and crafts, but I managed to sell a couple of books. I met with the Deputy High Sheriff of Shropshire and his wife. Maybe they will be a good contact for the future. Although it was not yet printed, they showed a lot of interest in the concept of Konk.

Sunday, 2nd July 2023. I had another free event in my home town of Madeley. This one at a dry ski slope club called the Astro Turf. I sold only two books, the rainy, windy weather wasn’t great for an outside event.